


Lingering Shadows

by ZenlessZen



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: F/M, Ficlet, Good Boyfriend!ZEN, Hurt/Comfort, Panic Attacks, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Reporters are wild man, after good end
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-05
Updated: 2019-03-05
Packaged: 2019-11-12 12:52:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18011261
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ZenlessZen/pseuds/ZenlessZen
Summary: The shadow grew at night. She would wake up each morning with the blankets strewn across the bed and the pillows on the floor and a heavy feeling in her heart as if she hadn’t slept a wink. And Zen knew.





	Lingering Shadows

MC thought she was doing okay. The party went without a hitch. Zen had publicly announced his relationship with her and she couldn’t be happier. Yes, she really thought she was okay, pushing aside the lingering tension in her mind. The little black shadow that told her that she wasn’t entirely safe.    
  
The shadow grew at night. She would wake up each morning with the blankets strewn across the bed and the pillows on the floor and a heavy feeling in her heart as if she hadn’t slept a wink. And Zen knew. He could see it in her eyes. But there was nothing he could do, when even she didn’t realize what was haunting her. She tried to grasp onto it desperately, but it always floated just out of the reach of her consciousness. “ _ Not yet.”  _ It seemed to say. “ _ Soon.” _

 

It hit her too late.She had been trying to push through a swarm of reporters, hadn’t she? She was trying to get to the door of the restaurant for the date that Zen had planned. They were shouting questions at her, so many that it felt like she was drowning in them. Then she felt a strong grip on her arm. The shadow rose like a wave and swallowed her whole.   
  
There was an arm around her neck. Hot breath on her cheek. “Let me take you to paradise, Princess.” She wanted to struggle. She wanted to scream. But she couldn’t. It was like she was frozen in place. She could hear a faint scream in the distance. It sounded like her voice. But it couldn’t be, right? Her lips weren’t moving. She couldn't move her lips. She couldn’t scream. Her thoughts all crowded around her. The arm around her neck tightened. Tighter and tighter and tighter until she couldn’t-

 

**“Breathe!”**

 

A voice cut through everything. “Jagiya, please breathe with me. Sweetheart, just like that. In-” there was the sound of someone exaggeratedly sucking air into their lungs “-and out.” An exhale. 

 

She tried to match it, sucking in air as best she could with the arm around her throat. It hurt. It hurt to breathe. But the more she did it, the more faded the picture became. She could move again. Her chest was rising and falling to a steady rhythm. The arm didn’t feel like it was pressing so hard anymore.    
  
“Good job, Jagiya. Now, can you name 5 things you can see for me?” Zen murmured.    
  
Things she could see. She blinked, blearily trying to focus. “A red tile floor.” She began softly. “Your knees. T… tables… C… chairs… A… a… and… “ She felt herself slipping, the shadow trying to rise up again.   
  


And again Zen’s voice cut through it, like a hot knife through butter. “You’re doing so well, Jagiya. Just one more thing you see.”    
  
She could see his hands, resting on his thighs. They were balled into tense fists, like he was trying to stop himself from doing something. “Your hands.” She whispered. The taut muscles relaxed.    
  
“Good.” He exhaled. “You’re doing really good. Four things you hear princess, can you list them off for me?”    
  
“Your voice.” She said instantly, it being the first sound she had latched onto. She tried to scan around for more. “Forks and knives on plates. Scraping of chairs. P… people talking.”   
  
“That’s it Jagiya. Three things you feel.” His voice sounded a lot calmer as well.    
  
MC could feel herself relaxing. “The floor… My skirt.” She trailed off, looking around for something else to add. Her hair fell to her shoulder. “My hair?” She lifted her gaze, finally meeting Zen’s eyes. 

 

He smiled at her, his face a mosaic of concern and relief. “Do you want to continue, or are you okay?” He asked softly.    
  
MC nodded. “I’m… okay.” She whispered.    
  
“Can I touch you?” He unfurled his fist and held his hand out to her, palm up.    
  
She placed her hand in his, nodding. “What… what happened?”    
  
“You suddenly screamed and fell to the floor. I managed to get you into the restaurant but you were hyperventilating.” His thumb stroked over the back of her hand, trying to soothe her. “Where were you?”   
  
“In the apartment. H… he was trying to…take me away again.” She whispered.    
  
Zen squeezed her hand and held out his other hand, and invitation for her to come close. She let herself get pulled into his arms. He wrapped them loosely around her, making sure it didn’t feel binding. She began to feel far more relaxed, knowing that he was being careful with her. Simply knowing it was Zen holding her now, made her feel safe. He began rocking her in his arms. “It’s okay, Princess. I won’t let him hurt you. You’re safe,” he murmured into her hair.    
  
“Someone grabbed m… my arm and I… “ She what? Panicked? She didn’t know how to describe it. She was reliving the moment. It was real. He was there and he was choking her. She really couldn’t breathe. She felt the heat from Zen’s palm on her cheek, his thumb gently sweeping away her stray tears.    
  
“Shhh.” He whispered. “I’m sorry. I should have been more careful, hmm?”    
  
She wanted to protest, to let him know that this wasn’t his fault. But the words wouldn’t come out of her mouth.    
  
He sighed, his warm breath hitting the top of her hair. “I should have paid more attention. I noticed you haven’t been sleeping well. I should have anticipated this.”    
  
“Hyun. It’s okay.” MC managed to rasp out. “I’m glad you were here for me this time.” She tilted her head up to look at him.   
  
His eyes softened as he met her gaze, pools of ruby radiating warmth and affection. “I’ll always be here, princess. This time, and every time after.” He gently kissed her forehead. “Let’s go home, my love.”   
  
She slowly nodded as Zen scooped her up in his arms and rose to his feet. She could feel the shadow shriveling up and retreating to the corners of her mind where Zen’s love couldn’t reach. But it was creeping, the warmth seeping in through cracks and crevices. A small reminder of no matter what demons haunted her, Zen was always there.    
  
“Let’s go home.”


End file.
